Me Time, We Time, and Family Time: The Importance of Finding Balance

In today's busy world, it can feel like we're constantly running on empty. We're bombarded with demands from work, school, family, and friends, and it's easy to neglect our own needs. But if we don't make time for ourselves, we'll eventually run out of gas.

That's why it's so important to find balance between me time, we time, and family time. Me time is the time we spend on our own, doing things that we enjoy and that help us relax and recharge. We time is the time we spend with our spouse or partner, building and maintaining a strong relationship. And family time is the time we spend with our immediate family, creating memories and strengthening bonds.

Finding balance between these three types of time can be challenging, but it's essential for our mental and physical health. When we don't get enough me time, we can become stressed, overwhelmed, and even depressed. We're also more likely to make poor decisions and to lash out at others.

On the other hand, when we don't get enough we time, we can feel isolated and lonely. Our relationships can suffer, and we may find it difficult to connect with others on a deep level.

And when we don't get enough family time, we can miss out on some of the most important moments in our lives.

The good news is that finding balance between me time, we time, and family time is possible. It just takes a little intentionality. Here are a few tips:

Me Time:

• Schedule regular time for yourself. Even if it's just 30 minutes a day, make sure you have some time each day to do something that you enjoy.

• Find activities that you love. This could be reading, taking a bath, going for a walk, or spending time in nature. Whatever you choose, make sure it's something that relaxes you and helps you recharge.

• Be honest with your loved ones about your need for me time. Let them know that you're not trying to be selfish, but that you need some time to yourself to be your best self.

• Be willing to compromise. If your partner or child wants to spend time with you, but you're really craving some me time, see if you can find a way to compromise. For example, you could agree to spend an hour with them, and then take an hour for yourself afterwards.

We Time:

• Going on dates: This is a classic way to spend time with your spouse and reconnect. You could go to the movies, out to dinner, or even just for a walk in the park.

• Cooking together: This is a great way to bond and learn new skills. You could try a new recipe, or just make your favorite comfort food.

• Going on vacation: This is a great way to create memories and relax together. You could go to the beach, the mountains, or even just a different city.

Family Time:

• Mealtimes: Eating together as a family is a great way to connect and catch up. You can talk about your day, share stories, and just enjoy each other's company.

• Outings: Going on outings together is a great way to create memories and explore new places. You could go to the park, the zoo, the museum, or even just for a walk around the block.

• Just being together: Sometimes, the best family time is just spending time together and talking. You could sit on the couch and watch a movie, read a book together, or just chat about your day.

My husband and I learned this lesson the hard way. Carlos and I have been married for 18 years and together for 24. We have always had the utmost respect for each other, and we rarely argued. We got along well and enjoyed spending time together. We were what most people would consider a solid couple.

However, many years ago, in the midst of marriage and young children, Carlos turned to me and said, "I feel like we are more friends than lovers." I felt the life drain out of my body. My initial reaction was to go into problem-solving mode, which is my natural defense mechanism. I suggested couples therapy and tried to switch gears, but it was too little too late.

The next year was a blur. On the brink of divorce, we decided to separate. During this time, we both had to learn what it was like to be a parent—or, more importantly, an adult—on our own. We had to discover our identities without each other. This was the most trying time of my life. It was messy, erratic, and felt like learning to fly a plane while flying. But in the end, we made it.

We each took responsibility in the matter, did what we needed to do, and eventually found our way back to each other with a new understanding of relationships. We realized that we had an imbalance in our relationship, with too much focus on family and not enough on ourselves as individuals. We now make time for "me time," "we time," and "family time." This has helped us to reconnect as lovers and friends, and we are stronger than ever before, however it will always be a work in progress.

Our story is a reminder that even the strongest relationships can go through tough times. If you are feeling like your marriage is more like a friendship, don't give up. There is still hope. With communication, effort, and a willingness to change, you can get your relationship back on track.

I hope our story helps others who are going through a similar situation. Remember, you are not alone. Finding balance between me time, we time, and family time is essential for our health and happiness. So make sure you make time for all three, and you'll be well on your way to living a more fulfilling life.